inner stress

well guess what the doctor said?

"I can see that you're leading there, its very professional that your smiling in front of everyone but actually your eyes... you have a lot of things going on inside, things that you are not willing to seek help or want to solve"

well damn right you are, but i dont smile 24/7 in front of ppl just coz its 'professional' i smile coz my beloved grandpa taught me to. and it bacame a habit i cant shake off unless i hate you. lmao. and with that, i need to go to bed early like 11pm wtfbbqlmaothisisnothappening which i kind of did ( i played pokemon until i felt asleep ) but it gave me weird ass dream and i cant sleep well the whole night.

1. my lil sis is doing something stupid but i cant remember what
2. i pay for bus ride fee inclusive for my mother but she wasnt there
3. some random dude with the same birthday as i

weird ass dream right? it made me woke up and wtf and sleep back and bah. derppy morning. but today after work. my mom called, my aunty called. and they all asking about me whether if i found room to move out to. and well. i kind of dont want to talk bout it coz i know thats one of my inner stress... things dont go as plan and mom just made it worst, oh, i feel stress even after work today.

i think i need to shut my phone after work next time. but i dun wanna be like certain someone whom cant be contacted. irritated as i may. i still need to bare with all this. with a smile. coz thats totally professional.

rofl.

so yea. i just need to cut down on food and entertainment and be like the cheapskate pussy boys in the office. no. really. they are so cheap i feel just like a manry mang being there. so trying to ohm myself now... ohmm lize ohm.. go bath and think about life and hopefully bitches dont----

...

forget about it. those whore just hog the bathroom again...